Couples Therapy: From Me to We

Couples Therapy: From Me to We

Why is it so hard to fight cleanly in the midst of an argument with the person we are supposed to love most, particularly when we already know tools and techniques for kinder conflict resolution? Why do we choose to punish our partners rather than play fair? It’s...

The Problem with Charisma

The Problem with Charisma

 You’ve experienced them. The attractive person in front of you at the coffee shop who smiles at you and makes some witty comment, and all of a sudden you feel intensely drawn to this stranger and start desperately plotting ways to sit down next to them and carry on...

Conflict Revolution

Conflict Revolution

On a physiological level, the human body is wired to respond immediately to conflict as if it was life threatening. Within moments, the body releases the “stress hormones”, adrenaline and cortisol, which allow for increased speed, hyper-vigilance, and the ability to...

Mental Health in an Age of Insanity

Mental Health in an Age of Insanity

Dictionary.com defines mental health as the psychological "well-being and satisfactory adjustment to society and to the ordinary demands of life". Satisfactory adjustment to society and the ordinary demands of life. The day after Trump was elected, I sat in my office...

Dismantle Your Happiness Fantasy

Dismantle Your Happiness Fantasy

One of the most common causes of suffering that I witness as a psychotherapist is the belief that life is supposed to be easy, and that people are supposed to be happy most of the time. When life is hard, or people experience themselves as more identified with feeling...